Once someone explained what “ecology” was to me, I knew it would be a very useful thing to consider when deciding if one of my big ideas is worth pursuing or not.
I know this will be very difficult to believe, but I have pursued some humdingers of bad ideas in the past.
I heard someone say wisdom comes from experience, and experience comes from bad decisions. I’ve then had people tell me that they think I’m very wise.
I tell them “Oh yeah? Well, your mom is fat!”
No, I’m kidding.
So anyway, I have pursued my fair share of bad decisions.
I could give examples of my most egregious ones, but why bother kicking my own ass? Just ask around.
“Oh, yeah, that Larry Turner, let me tell you a story about this guy…”
They will then regale you with some outlandish sounding tales of some crazy bad decisions.
So anyway…
So when I heard about ecology, I knew immediately that if I had a “big idea,” merely considering the ecology would help me avoid pursuing future “bad decisions.”
Ecology means:
Is it good for me?
Is it good for others?
Is it good for the environment?
The more I consider those in weighing my decisions, the less likely that I would walk away from my decision with regrets.
Good ecology has to have all three, and if instead of good my decision risks harming any one of those three things, I’ll just abandon the idea.
Is it good for me?
For much of my life, I was a “people-pleaser,” and found myself doing things to appease, gain acceptance and approval out of a fear of abandonment. My own needs, wants, and desires were often ignored as I chased the acceptance of others. I was finding all of my sense of personal value only in the eyes of others, that, and I was miserable.
I was once asked, “What feelings do you experience internally after giving in to others?”
My answer was “Resentment.”
Resentment does not feel good to hold, and we humans create our own suffering.
In good ecology, I matter. It has to be good for me.
Is it good for others?
Not ignoring my own needs, is this decision also good for others?
Where I found value, joy, and purpose is in being part of something larger than myself, and being of service.
M. Scott Peck wrote in the Road Less Traveled that love is:
The will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth.
I try to consciously spread kindness and love to others as a way of being, and if I cannot be of service to others, “at least don’t harm anyone.”
Is it good for the environment?
Humans are the caretakers of this planet, but the universe is actually in charge.
If my decision negatively impacts the environment around me, life and the universe itself will conspire against me to clean up the mess of my decision.
If I have all three, I might vote in favor of my idea and pursue it.
Ecology itself is NOT a guarantee of success.
As David Rico points out in his book, The Five Things We Cannot Change: And The Happiness We Find By Embracing Them:
-Everything changes and ends
-Things don’t always go according to plan
-Life isn’t always fair
-Pain is a part of life
-People aren’t loving and loyal all the time
If I have considered the ecology, however, it is vastly less likely that I will walk away from my decision or “big idea” with regret (which sucks as bad as resentment to hold onto).
