My brain never shuts off.
I was meditating the other day and during the metacognition phase, I noticed that I had slipped into a dream.
I was being distracted by my thoughts, and then those thoughts morphed into an unrealistic dream.
But I noticed it, I noticed the exact moment it happened.
As soon as I noticed that I was in a dream, I forced myself to “wake up,” and focus on my breath again, chastising myself for “falling asleep.”
Then the thought manifested, “Well, that was cool. Do it again.”
And I did.
Very quickly my thoughts turned back into an unrealistic dream.
I did this a few times.
Sure, technically I was “falling asleep,” and then “waking up,” repeatedly.
The thing is, I was choosing to do that.
It felt like I was flying a plane, dipping in and out of consciousness, as if I were knowingly skimming the surface of it, up and down.
I realized there wasn’t much difference between the conscious thoughts I have when I’m “awake” and the dreams I have when I’m “asleep.”
It’s not like I had to engage a separate part of my brain for that “shift” to occur.
So, I think my conscious thoughts and my “dreams” are the same thing.
It’s just my brain churning out data, creating thoughts (thoughts which “I” notice)..
The only difference between the dreams and the thoughts is “I” (the “me”-ness in “me”, the “controller” of my focus) is suddenly “off-duty”.
That means “I” am not present, examining my thoughts and saying “No, that’s one’s wrong. That one’s bullshit. Hey, think about this ____ instead.”
When I’m not “awake” doing that, my brain is still working, churning out the very exact same thoughts as it always does when I am awake, just now it does it unsupervised and “unfiltered.”
“The little decision maker inside the meat-puppet” is “off duty” when my brain “dreams.”
Now, combine that with the knowledge that my entire life experience is being projected to “me” from inside my own mind, who is to say what’s real and what’s not real?
